jun 17, 2018

Ingestuurd door: Barbera

Have you ever felt not sure of yourself, different, like there is something wrong with you?

If you have just started to learn what it means to be “highly sensitive” then you might feel really euphoric (because it feels like coming home to yourself) or completely devastated (because you realize that 80% of the people are not at all like you and you want to be like everybody else) or something in between.

If you are not sure if you are an HSP, you can do my Quiz.

You might even feel that it is pointless to learn everything there is to know about this trait that you inherited.

But that is where you are wrong.

With this article I want to help you to embrace your (high) sensitivity, to start using it as your super power and to create a life that accommodates your (high) sensitivity, instead of the other way around where it can feel as if your life is being dictated by it.

High sensitivity is a characteristic of the nervous system and it's main characteristic is (extreme) sensitivity for external stimuli.

About 15-20% of the world's population is (high) sensitive. The trait can be found equally in men and women, but can also be found in the animal kingdom. The concept of (high) sensitivity was first discovered by psychotherapist Dr Elaine Aron in the mid-1990’s.

Do you want to know which characteristics belong to being Highly Sensitive? Download my free checklist.

The nervous system, which not only consists of our nerves but also includes our brain and our skin, is finely tuned and it comprises several layers. The skin is the outer limit of your body and the nerves, brain and sensory perception organs are on the inside.

Our body interacts with the outside world through our skin and our sensory organs.They make us aware of our surroundings, but they also make us aware of the energies and emotions of other people as well as electronic waves or magnetic fields.

This means that as a (high) sensitive person, your nerves and sensory organs can become easily overstimulated if you have not learned how to protect yourself from that.

This also explains why you might feel overwhelmed at times, when others don't.

But I have good news :)

Just like an athlete can train him or herself to push their physical limits to increase their sport performances, you can train your physical limit to ‘filter’ the information it passes on to your brain.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying it's easy and it requires a lot of practice, but it can be done. And it is probably not even the most challenging task that you have learned to master.

But most importantly, it is totally worth it!

When you train your body and mind to become more selective as to which stimuli you follow op on and which ones you put on the waiting list or discard completely, you will save a lot of energy AND it will help you to become a more balanced and happier person that's appreciated not only by yourself, but by others too.

And who does not want that?

So here are my 5 tips for you:

Tip 1: Take really good care of yourself

As opposed to popular belief, it is NOT selfish to take really good care of yourself!

Taking good care of yourself means that you keep your body and mind in good (physical) condition. This will help you to guard your boundaries and it will help you to smoothly filter all the information that you receive through your sensory organs.

The unhealthier your body is, the harder it is to feel good.

How do you keep yourself in good (physical) condition?

Easy. You just have to create a good balance between activity, rest, exercise, entertainment, duty and pleasure.

Did you just say easy? That does not sound easy at all....

Just take it one step at a time, it does not have to be perfect right away. The most important thing is that you start. Start by teaching your body to want healthy foods, drinks and exercise.

Exercise for instance can be going for a walk every day. This will help you to release physical and psychological tension. And if you don't like walking, take your bike for a ride.

I myself often walk (or bike) in nature, because nature is a great place to calm down. Nature helps to (re)connect with yourself and your core strength again. Find a place in nature that feels soothing and go there often to 'recharge'.

Remember you are your company and the healthier you are, the healthier your company is!

Tip 2: Make sure you always put your needs first

Maybe you regularly feel insecure and/or 'different' then the rest and this might even make you feel lonely at times?

You don't have to feel that way.

This feeling usually originates from your inner child and it is usually a signal that you 'need' something or feel like you are missing something. The key thing to understand is that you (as an adult) can give your inner child what it needs/misses.

Comfort yourself when you are afraid, give yourself companionship when you feel lonely or help yourself when you feel lost in new situations. Ask yourself what you have to do or say to comfort yourself, especially when facing new challenges. Don't judge yourself or get upset with yourself, but find out what you need so you can make yourself feel better.

This way you can always count on your own support. And trust that things will get easier the more often you do them.

And taking care of your needs goes beyond just your inner needs, it extends to your practical needs as well, like a corner or a room all to yourself in which you can pull back when you need “me” time or having a trusted friend or advisor to talk to whenever you feel stuck or just need a shoulder.

Taking care of your own needs and putting them first is also not selfish. Instead it is critical to your survival in this world.

If you don't take care of yourself and put your needs first, then how will you feel good?

And if you don't feel good, how can you be there for your clients?

Do you want to successfully use your sensitivity as a business advantage so you will achieve better business results with much less effort and so much more fun & energy?

Tip 3: Care less about what others think

With some people you just click, but others can be really intimidating. We are so busy with what other people think of us and if they will like us, that we forget to be true to yourself and our own needs and we let them walk all over our boundaries. Especially with the people we value the most.

But why not use these situations to learn to be more resilient?

'Ok....' I hear you think, 'sounds good but how do I do that?”

Start by practicing to keep in touch with your intuition and use your intuition to guide you in those situations. This will really help you to stay true to yourself and your thoughts, to feel and guard your boundaries and you will be amazed at how empowered that makes you feel and act!

Here are some examples of things to avoid in situations your are uncomfortable with:

• Don't defend yourself right away. Feel before you act. Do you really need to defend yourself? Or lies the problem with the other?
• Don't let yourself become overwhelmed. Instead just walk away, leave the scene.

Who cares what they think as long as you like your thoughts about yourself. Stay calm, centered and in your strength. Don't follow them in their energy, instead choose to remain in your (positive) energy.

Later, when you are alone and you feel the need to, go over the situation again and find out what about it you found difficult. Research the situation as objectively as possible (or ask for help in doing so). Be assertive, but avoid negative reactions. Send out positive energy instead.

See if you can look past someone's behavior, past what has happened and instead look to the person himself. Maybe there are extenuating circumstances? Did this situation remind you of a person or situation from the past? Try to put events in a less personal perspective.

And when you experience emotions as a reaction to the situation, make sure you create an outlet for those emotions. You might want to talk it through with someone you trust or you might want to physically release them by shouting it out in the car, slapping a pillow or going for a run.

Ask yourself these questions:

• Do I want to improve the contact or situation? And if so what can I do to improve the contact or situation?
• Do I need to let go of certain beliefs or expectations so that these situations won't bother me anymore in the future? If so, which beliefs or expectations do I need to let go? And then work on it.

And when you see no chance of improvement, make sure that you stand your ground firmly.

You are not a doormat, fiends, family and clients should not walk all over you so don't let them!

Do you want to successfully use your sensitivity as a business advantage so you will achieve better business results with much less effort and so much more fun & energy?

Tip 4: Give yourself permission to do less

Elaine Aron says the one thing that affects highly sensitive people more than anything else is "too much overwhelm and stress."

So give yourself permission to do less!

And the key to doing less is to give yourself permission to take time out for rest and recovery.

As a sensitive person, you probably need more down time, or “me” time as I like to call it, than other people. Be kind, gentle and loving with yourself as you explore how much time you want and need for yourself. Recognize that you live in a world where more often than not bigger, better and faster is seen as superior to doing less.

However, for the highly sensitive person, it's essential that you take the time to find the right balance between what you are doing and just being. This is your key to inner health and happiness.

Especially when you are a highly sensitive entrepreneur.

You became an entrepreneur because of the freedom is grands you. So use that freedom!

If you are an evening person, like me, then don't push yourself to start your day early or to have your first appointments at 8:30. Instead feel your bodies natural rhythm and accommodate your business to support your needs.

When it's lovely weather and you want to enjoy it, then enjoy it! You can always work in the evening or just work a little less that day. And don't feel guilty!

You are your company, so when you are doing good, are in flow, have positive energy and generally feel good, then that reflects in your business.

So doing less can actually mean doing better.

Tip 5: Set a positive Intention for yourself everyday

Setting an intention, especially if you do it first thing in the morning, is a powerful way to focus your mind on the (positive) feelings that you want to create and experience throughout your day.

Setting intentions will help you to release old emotions and negative mental chatter and this will leave you feeling empowered and confident about yourself, your body and your life.

For me it always works best to set my daily intentions in the morning before I get out of bed so that I won't forget/get distracted by daily stuff, but you can do them at a time that suits you. Take a few seconds each day and simply say to yourself, "My intention for today is to __________."

I always set a personal intention, something I want to attract for myself today and I set a business intention, something I want to attract for my company today. And last but not least, I set an intention for the type of person I want to be throughout the day and an intention for the activities I want to do.

I hope some of these tips where real eye openers for you. If you have any more questions, you need advice or you just want to talk things through then book a FREE Breakthrough Clarity call with me – I am happy to help!

Or download my free checklist if you still are not sure if you are a Highly Sensitive Entrepreneur.

Which of these tips do you find the most helpful?

Is there a particular one that you wanted to apply immediately?

And which of these tips do you already use in your daily life?

If you liked this article, then please share it with your network, they will greatly appreciate it, as will I :)

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